In many countries, children become adults once they turn a certain age, usually from 18 to 21 years, depending on the country. Becoming an adult is important, for the young adult can now participate in activities previously restricted by society, such as drinking. The reason why society uses age as an indicator of adulthood is because by that age, the child will have experienced enough in his life to develop into a young adult. However, this crucial experience, such as losing a love one, that marks adulthood, may come much earlier than the standard age set by society. This too is a coming of age, and it is different for every child, for his or her experiences are shaped by the environment and situation in which they grew up in. This essay will utilize the Dutch film For a Lost Soldier to examine how the environment and situation of children can affect their development into adults or their coming of age.
For a Lost Solider, written and directed by Roeland Kerbosch, is based on the autobiographical novel of choreographer Rudi van Dantzig, the internationally prominent ballet choreographer. The film starts with famous choreographer Jeroen Boman struggling with his latest work. He recalls a relationship that had a significant effect on his life. He wants his dancers to understand what he is trying to express in a ballet about freedom and liberation. It so happens that his assistant uncovers a photograph which takes Jeroen on a journey back to his youth. “He comes to realize that he must confront what happened between him and Walt so long ago, which he seems to have suppressed and which clearly has left him traumatized” (Thomas).
The majority of the film occurs as a flashback to the year 1944, near the end of World War II during the “Hunger Winter.” At this time, 12 year old Jeroen is among the children sent out of hungry, German-occupied Amsterdam to the northern countryside, relatively untouched by the conflict, to be fostered by a community of fishermen and farmers that has plenty of food. There, headed by a Bible-reading foster father, Jeroen adoptive family treats him with patient kindness, sensitive to his spells of silence and bouts of remoteness.
The war soon ends with the defeat of Nazi Germany. A platoon of American and Canadian soldiers parades through the village in a frail truck and a sputtering Jeep as they liberate the Dutch. This is when Jeroen meets one of the soldiers, Walt, a young, handsome man in his early twenties. The attraction between them is immediate. The two quickly develop a relationship that is far more than normal. For example, instead of dancing with the village ladies, Walt taught Jeroen the Jivebug dance in an intimate way. Soon Walt and Jeroen are sharing a bed and a shower stall, and there is a scene, more implied than explicit, in which Walt appears to have intercourse with Jeroen. Within a few days Walt, along with the platoon, departs the village. Jeroen eventually returns to Amsterdam and later to America where he becomes a ballet choreographer.
When Jeroen family sent him to Friesland, he believes that they no longer wanted to deal with him. He felt “shunted” but in reality, his family only wanted him to avoid the danger of war (Griffin). Jeroen’s emotional distress becomes even worse when he comes to live with his foster family. Hait, his foster father, is a very religious man. Hait believes that God is omniscient and omnipotent and so all of his family activities involve God. The family would strictly pray before every meal, and they would go to church every Sunday. This was not how Jeroen was raised, but he had to participate with his foster family. “Rather than fit in, Jeroen opts for the martyrdom of self- isolation”. Jeroen resents his foster family and feel “alienated” by them. In actuality, his foster family was very patient and kind toward him (Kerbos). It was this growing feeling of loneliness that causes Jeroen to change emotionally.
Leaving his family because of the war and having to live with strangers who he did not understand created confusion for Jeroen. This confusion in his life, of his self worth, and of his identity causes Jeroen to become an isolated person. He hides from the world and hides his emotion. Jan was Jeroen’s best friend, maybe not by choice but because of the circumstance. Jan had come to the village from Amsterdam like Jeroen. Jan was also the only boy Jeroen knew and the only boy that gave him attention. “Jeroen is feeling confused by the first stirrings of a sexuality that is leading him toward [Jan]” (Stone). Jan, however, did not reciprocate the infatuations of Jeroen, and over time Jeroen was able to let go of Jan.
This set up the stage for the young, handsome soldier Walt to come along and replace Jan. For a Lost Soldier portrays Walt almost as an innocence child even though he is a young man in his very early twenties. Walt enters the village along with his troops with a hero welcome. The villagers look at these soldiers that liberated them from the Nazi’s control with a very positive light. Though Jeroen was a bit of a recluse, his feeling for the soldiers was no different from the villagers. To Jeroen, these soldiers ended the war and gave Jeroen the possibility of returning back to Amsterdam and reuniting with his family.
When Walt marched into Jeroen life, Walt gave Jeroen more than just freedom. Walt notice Jeroen almost immediately and something sparks within Jeroen as well. “Their relationship starts as a boy's hero-worship, but it becomes more erotic”. The two quickly become much attached. Walt was Jeroen’s hero, the librator of his country but most importantly the liberator of his spirit. Walt gave Jeroen what he really needed – affection. This affection stems from common ground shared by the both of them. Even though Walt is about 8 years older than Jeroen, Walt is very similar to Jeroen in personality. Walt is like a quiet child who is filled with loneliness. In each other, they find companionship, a “playmate”, someone to fill the void inside their hearts. Walt takes Jeroen under his arms almost literally as he shows Jeroen to drive a jeep, clean a gun, and even do the Jivebug dance.
Connecting the previous paragraphs, the homosexual desire of Jeroen stems from many factors including the environment and situation. The war is the situation that triggers a series of events detrimental to the mental growth of Jeroen. These events include the human suffering from the war, the chaos around his hometown, and the worries of his family. The war also changes the environment for Jeroen. He no longer could live with his family but must go off to live with people he does not know. Living in a strange environment with people he does not understand at only 12 years old, Jeroen becomes confused, lost, and reclusive. He was in a state of despair and yearns for affection of anyone. He first seek this affection from his male friend Jan, but without any indication of a return in feeling, Jeroen becomes even more vulnerable to emotional damage. Jeroen and Walt are “Isolated from their respective families, who meet in the rapidly changing world of a major war. Being away from home-their hearts and minds full of new impressions about sex, life and death-they find what they need there and then: affection (Kerbosch). All this helps to explain why a 12 years old boy would willingly become sexually involve with a man. Ultimately, it were the distress from the war, the departure from Jeroen’s family, and a need to be rescue from loneliness that cause Jeroen to develop a likening to Walt.
Soon, Walt leaves Jeroen, but Walt had already left his mark on Jeroen. Jeroen eventually grow up into an adult and becomes a ballet choreographer, influenced by the dance lesson taught by Walt. Jeroen often gets choreographer’s block when he has to come up with a dance routine dealing with childhood. Even after 40 years, Jeroen is still affected by the events of his childhood.
In conclusion, the environments and situations that children grow up in can affect their coming of age. The film For a Lost Soldier was analyzed to show this claim, and since For a Lost Soldier is based on the real life of famous choreographer Van Datzig, the anylsis has strong credibility. What was found is that dramatic events tend to affect the psyche of a child such as a war. A single distress factor can cause more distress factors to accumulate into a snowball effect. All these negative factors can wreck havoc on the growth into adulthood of a child. Jeroen as the film suggested, becomes a homosexual due to negative consequences of World War II.
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